Monday 26 August 2019

Autistic Burnout - We Need to Take This Seriously

Autistic burnout. A really miserable thread but maybe the most important one yet. Please share. #autistic #autism #burnout /1

 (I'm serious, by the way. This won't be light hearted and won't be fun either. But it might help.) /2

 #autistic burnout is, currently, a strangely under-researched and lesser known aspect of autistic life. Unless you're autistic, if course, in which case you may be living it. And I use 'living' in the broadest sense of the term. /3

 The word 'burnout' is widely understood. People talk of experiencing 'career burnout', for example, or 'relationship burnout'. In all cases it has the same meaning: being so bored of something that you can't cope with it anymore. #autistic burnout is rather more serious /4

It is not the same as a meltdown, in that an #autistic meltdown is relatively short lived, acute and periodic. Its like falling down the stairs. Burnout, however, is falling off a cliff. /5

#autistic people may never experience burnout; likewise, it seems to be possible to experience more than one. But it appears an #autistic burnout *is* a significant threat for the autistic population and could be a direct contributor to the awful suicide rates. /6

#autistic burnout is a reaction, seemingly neurological and possibly (?) related to depression, whereby an autistic person has existed for too long beyond their coping limits and has suffered a kind of 'snap'. /7

Common causes given seem to be related to coping in a neurotypical world, but we don't know for sure. It may be that masking (that bandwidth-heavy technique we have to 'fit in') for sustained periods of years or more could be behind it. /8

Or perhaps that long term trauma of perpetually fraught communication with neurotypical people leads to it? Maybe it's hardwired as an inescapable part of the condition. We just don't know. And can I take a moment to elaborate on why we don't know? /9

We don't know because, to put it bluntly, no one cares. The vast majority of money poured into autism research goes into prevention and treatment, mostly for children. Adult #autistic people aren't really that interesting, it seems. /10

Burnout is likely to be primarily an adult #autistic phenomenon, and we're only just beginning to understand what this is. Adult autism research is like fucking hens teeth and it makes me angry. /11

 I'm growing old, slowly, and apart from asking cool older #autistic people on here, I have NO IDEA what to expect, as there's just nothing out there. But I digress. Back to the cheerful topic of burnout. /12

Anyway. Burnout hits quite suddenly, I think, most of the time. And from what I gather, and my own experience, it is like someone pulls a plug on some vital, unknowable aspect of your personality. Something seems to almost literally *break* inside your head. /13

I've read many accounts but a few things stand out. Firstly, it is often permanent. That in itself is terrifying. Not only does your brain break, but it may not be fixable. Awful. A lot of #autistic people say it doesn't seem to shift, whilst others have reported improvements /14

Secondly, it is worse than depression. I can vouch for this, having had both. Depression is awful and deathly and one of the worst things ever, but burnout somehow - is worse. It's sort of, more rational? Like, you know you're fucked, whereas depression can be irrational /15

Thirdly, it permanently affects your ability to mask. Maybe no bad thing, considering, but its a shock for both the #autistic person and their loved ones. No longer masking can (and this is the most heartbreaking thing) be perceived as a total personality change. Its not. /16

In fact it's the world seeing you how you really are, and the fact that can go down so badly is a surefire recipe to add some depression garnish to your burnout. /17

But this is real, and it quite possibly kills people, and yet no one knows anything about it. The world really is crap sometimes. But if you have your very own #autistic in your life, then here are some things to consider... /18

Firstly, just be aware that burnouts are a thing. This will help if/when it happens. /19

Second, do not see a burned out #autistic person as 'not themselves' because they are not masking. This is insulting and depressing. Realise you may well be seeing their soft underbelly, and be gentle. /20

Third, do not play your part in pushing someone into burnout. Give #autistic people what they need, as far as possible, and do not push them beyond their limits unless there is an exceptionally good reason. /21

 Fourth, help #autistic people know their limits. We have an uncanny knack of blowing right past our ability to cope (thanks, in part, to desperately wanting to fit in) so actively help us work ourselves out. It may save a life. /22

Anyone else got any tips? This thread has been a grim undertaking and I'm going to wrap it up here. Tomorrow I'll do a thread on happy autistic puppies or something. /23 Buy me a coffeeBuy me a coffee • • •

4 comments:

  1. I guess I should count myself lucky that my burnouts have not been permanent. However, I have had 4 or 5 now - and depression as well - and I can say that I've noticed it is taking longer to pull back from one, and they are becoming more frequent the older I get. Same for shutdowns, fwiw

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